Sir, he is not on speed, I swear

The pastor, or bishop of my church congregation is a fairly famous person very high up in the goings on of a very large sports organization. He also happens to be a great dad, and a humble, kind friend. A few nights ago he popped by to check on our family and and ask how things were going with our new girls home.

Hubs has been gone on a business trip for what feels like decades and something clicked - in a bad way- for Cookie Monster who smelled the adult testosterone from the other room. He came charing in at Famous Bishop, and alternated between slapping him, wrapping arms around his leg (which is as tall as my entire body) and biting it, and chucking balls at his face. For thirty minutes.

My child acted like I had given him some uppers and/or been bitten by a rabid racoon. It would have been humiliating if it wasn't so dang funny. Famous Bishop laughed, brushed it off, but importantly, not my child whom he continued to engage and goad and tolerate with all the patience and composure of Job. This darling man has six kids of his own and can handle himself with no-look passes from a flailing, spastic four-year-old. I noted that one can truly identify a seasoned father of boys when he can maintain eye contact with a woman and discuss revamping the nursery room at church (ooh, we need built in cabinets!) while balls fly and a child is convulsing at his feet in a fit of giggles.

Like any father, when I tried to pull Cookie away or chastise, he continued to facilitate and escalate the play in a way that I, as a mom, girl, what is the thing I am missing? cannot and do not do. I cannot play like this with my boys. I am not built this way. The rough housing and the made-up games and the fists and the hard throws make me tense. But Hubs, and Famous Bishop stay cool as cucumbers while managing to rile up and wear out little boys. It's a gift. I don't have it. And Cookie loved being played with in this way.  I was relieved to see that Famous Bishop didn't mind and Cookie was laughing so hard I thought he was going to add to the magic of it all by also peeing on our visitor.

Now what makes all this even better is that a friend of mine was here for dinner, who happens to have a minor crush on Famous Bishop. We are talking child-hood hero.  She had been hoping for a sighting for more than a year. We were in the kitchen preparing dinner and chatting when she admitted This bra is killing me. I am so uncomfortable. It's coming off. I of course, agreed she should start shedding her underclothes if they were making things unpleasant.

That is when the doorbell rang. I ran to get it, opened the door to Famous Bishop and knew there was a high liklihood of her passing out so I just went for it and said "Friend, I'd like you to meet ___________."

I was busy trying to keep my kid from killing him while he was here, so I am not sure, but there is a chance she was holding a book in front of her shirt the whole time.

Just an average night around here. Happy, blessed, calm, drug-free (unless you need it) night to you all.




SJ said...

*I* almost just peed myself laughing. I am embarrassed with you, I so get this. My little boys seem to smell the testosterone too...

Deb said...

*snort* tea while reading!

Sha Zam- said...

He's an easy boy to love!

Sharon said...

Uh, yes. It's lovely when you find someone who can just roll with it.

Deborah said...

Boys are so like this! I am bored to death playing boy games, but when I watch either my husband or my dad playing with my son, I can't tell who's having more fun, the adults or him.

Glad Cookie got to enjoy himself. :)

Brenda said...

Just catching up on your blog!!!! Is that D.A.? Is it crazy that i think i recognize him from just his bottom half of his face smiling?;) Die hard fan right here!!
Love that your little guy could just let loose and rough house with him!


Brenda said...

Just catching up on your blog!!! Is that D.A? Is it sad that i think i recognize him from the bottom half of his smiling face;)!!!! Die hard fan right here.
Love that your little guy could let loose with him..Awesome:)


Melissa said...

So great for both of them.